We all have that voice inside our heads—the one that tells us we're not good enough, that we don't deserve success, or that we'll never make it.
But what if that voice is lying to you? What if the beliefs you've been carrying about your worth and potential aren't grounded in truth but simply stories you've been telling yourself for years?
The good news is you have the power to rewrite that narrative and break free from the lies that hold you back.
In Season 1, Episode 6 of That Sh*t Doesn't Define You, we explore how self-limiting beliefs can trap us in a cycle of self-doubt and prevent us from reaching our full potential. Our guest, Ashley St. Clair, shares her journey of overcoming adversity and confronting the lies that almost kept her from becoming the woman she is today. We discuss the science behind cognitive distortions, how these lies take root, and most importantly—how we can reframe them to empower ourselves.
If you're ready to break free from the stories that no longer serve you and rewrite your truth, let's dive into the steps you can take right now to live authentically, confidently, and purposefully.
The Lies We Tell Ourselves
We all have limiting beliefs—those thoughts that tell us we're not enough, not worthy, or not capable of achieving our dreams. These beliefs don't come from nowhere. They result from cognitive distortions - irrational thought patterns that distort our perception of reality. Some of the most common cognitive distortions include:
- All-or-nothing thinking: "If I fail at this, I'm a failure."
- Mental filtering: "I only focus on what went wrong and ignore what went right."
- Personalization: "Everything is my fault. If something goes wrong, it's because of me."
These thought patterns are powerful because they shape how we see ourselves and the world around us. Unfortunately, the more we entertain these thoughts, the more they become ingrained in our minds, creating a cycle of negativity that's hard to break.
Why Our Brain Believes What We Tell It
Our brains have something called confirmation bias—they seek evidence to support the beliefs we already hold. So, if you repeatedly tell yourself that you're not good enough, your brain will find proof of that. It's as if the mind is hardwired to reinforce what we believe, even when those beliefs aren't true.
But the flip side is that if we change the story we tell ourselves, our brains can begin to seek evidence that supports the new truth. A NeuroImage (2016) study found that the more we practice positive self-talk and self-affirmation, the stronger the neural pathways for those positive beliefs become. This means that you can rewire your brain to reinforce empowering beliefs and release the lies that have been holding you back.
Actionable Steps to Overcome the Lies
Now that we've explored how the mind works let's dive into actionable steps you can take to challenge the lies you've been telling yourself and rewrite your truth. Here are four key steps to break free from limiting beliefs:
- Identify the Lies You're Telling Yourself
Awareness is the first step toward change. Many of us don't even realize we're living by false beliefs. Take a moment to reflect and ask yourself:
- What's one thing I believe about myself that holds me back?
- Where did this belief come from?
- Is this belief really true, or is it just a story I've been telling myself for years?
This simple act of awareness is the first step in disarming those limiting beliefs.
- Challenge the Lies with Evidence
Once you've identified the lies, it's time to challenge them head-on. You can't stop the lies if you don't confront them. Ask yourself:
- What evidence supports this belief?
- What evidence contradicts it?
By confronting the lie and seeing the truth, you weaken its grip on your life.
Now, replace the lie with a new, empowering truth. For example:
- Lie: "I'm not smart enough."
- Truth: "I've faced challenges and learned from them, proving my ability to grow and succeed."
- Reframe Setbacks as Steps Forward
Failures and mistakes are often the breeding ground for self-limiting beliefs. But instead of letting setbacks reinforce your doubts, reframe them as opportunities for growth. Every challenge is a lesson in disguise.
Action Tip: The next time you face a setback, ask yourself:
- What can I learn from this?
- How does this challenge help me grow stronger?
Start a "Lessons Learned" journal where you record your setbacks and the lessons you gain from each one. Over time, you'll see how your mistakes actually fuel your growth.
- Take One Action Aligned with Your New Truth
The best way to weaken a limiting belief is to take action that contradicts it. If you've been telling yourself, "I'm not worthy of success," the only way to break that belief is to take an action that proves the opposite.
For example:
- If your new truth is, "I am capable of success," take one step toward a goal you've been putting off.
- If your new truth is, "I am worthy of love," reach out to someone you trust for support.
The Road to Empowerment
Rewriting your truth is the most powerful step in breaking free from limiting beliefs. You have the tools to challenge those old stories and replace them with beliefs that empower you to live fully.
Remember, you are not defined by your past, your mistakes, or the lies you've been telling yourself. You are worthy, capable, and destined for greatness. Now it's time to step into the next chapter of your story.
Want more insights on breaking free from limiting beliefs?
Let’s continue rewriting our stories and stepping into the empowered versions of ourselves.
